Last
week, we played with some ideas to help you clear the mental blockages &
obstacles that may formerly have prevented you from reaching certain goals.
This week, we’re going to have a look at how changing one word can transform
the way you feel about certain “less than pleasant” tasks & make you feel
much more resourceful.
But
first of all, hats off to Nikki Owen (Uber-assistant of my company, Salad)
who saved my bacon (and quite possibly my sanity) a few months back with
some classic Real World NLP.
A bit
of background: I used to work managing large, mission-critical business
projects for publishing companies. While I was good at my job, there was a
minor problem: I really didn’t like it! So I quit my job, learned NLP &
created Salad so I could do what I love.
So far
so good.
The
problem started when we set some new business goals, and I decided that we
needed to use a ‘project’ to make them happen. We duly started having
meetings, creating plans, and generally doing all the things you need to do
when running a project.
And I
started getting tense. Then I started getting tenser…
It
came to a head when Nikki told me that for a week or two I’d been snippy
with the people on my team. Now here’s the thing: I have an amazing
team at Salad, and the last thing I want to do is be snippy
with them.
Plus,
being snippy totally messes with my preferred self-image as a wise and
serene leader! We had to do something fast.
That’s
when Nikki had one of her (not uncommon) flashes of brilliance: “Instead of
calling it a project, we’re going to call it an adventure.”
Now, I
know you may be saying “That’s just changing the name”, but it’s actually
doing much much more.
You
see, words don’t start at the mouth. When you hear or say a word, loads of
associations are brought into your mind. If the words have quite a narrow
focus (Eg. iPod, chair, towel) then the range of connections in your mind is
typically quite small. But for words with a broader focus, or where you have
a lot of emotionally-charged experience, the range of connections is much
larger.
1)
Identify an activity or process that’s important to you, but that you don’t
feel particularly resourceful about.
For
me, it was something I was describing as a project, but other examples might
be:
·
A test
·
A report
·
A meeting
·
A bill
·
A
deadline
·
A goal
In my
case, describing something as a project activated certain skills & abilities
(useful) and a whole bunch of unpleasant memories & emotions (less useful).
In my mind, the word project was associated with a bunch of images,
sounds, smells, tastes & feelings that was something like a medieval vision
of hell.
2) What are some of the ways
you could describe this more resourcefully?
|
Unresourceful
Example |
Possible
Resourceful Alternatives |
|
A project |
·
An adventure
·
An experiment
|
|
A test |
·
A checkpoint
·
A review
·
Measuring your progress
|
|
A report |
·
A distillation of information
·
An action plan
·
A discovery document
|
|
A meeting |
·
A get-together
·
A possibility session
|
|
A deadline |
·
Crossing the finish line
·
A success date
|
|
A goal |
·
An aspiration
·
A vision
|
The
key is describing it “more resourcefully”. Lots of people refer to
“problems” as “challenges”, but if doing that has no effect for you, call it
something else.
For
me, the word adventure, is associated with a bunch of images, sounds,
smells, tastes & feelings that was more like a path through a lush forest,
with beautiful rolling hills in the distance.
Aaaah.
And relax.
3)
Experiment with different descriptions & notice how you respond to them.
When you get a description that has useful associations (ie. It feels good &
you can take positive action as necessary), congratulate yourself.
Once
we figured this out, I did some NLP to get access to all the project
skills & other resources, while leaving all the nasty project feelings &
associations in a box at the bottom of the ocean.
But
I’ll keep calling it an adventure. After all, anything worth doing is worth
getting excited about!
Have a
great week,
Best
wishes
Your friend
Jamie
Jamie Smart
director of training
jamie.smart@saladltd.co.uk
If you have found this tip useful, please share it with any friends,
family, colleagues and associates who you think will be interested. You are
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continue to enjoy the tips. I am always grateful for any comments,
criticisms or other feedback that you may have. Please send them to
jamie.smart@saladltd.co.uk
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