Last week we explored the power of deep rapport. This week, I'm going to let you in on a fascinating discovery made by NLP co-developer, Robert Dilts. In this article, I'm going to reveal the 3 “essentials” that every changeworker needs to know.

Nine years ago, I learned a form of energy therapy that promised rapid results in 90% of cases. At the course, I was amazed as the trainer healed long-held phobias, anxieties & compulsions in just a few minutes using non-verbal interventions. I went out into the world with my new skills, enthusiastic to show people what was possible. But I found that my results were nowhere near as impressive as those of the trainer – the 90% clear-up rate seemed a long way off. 

Then I heard a story about Robert Dilts & healers. Dilts found people from a variety of backgrounds who were masters of healing. Some came from a traditional medicine, others from therapy. Some used bodywork, others used coaching. Some used non-verbal approaches, others were entirely verbal. As Dilts modeled these extraordinary healers, he found 3 things that they all shared in common.

In my work as a trainer & a coach, I've found that these 3 things apply, whatever mode I'm working in.
 

ESSENTIAL ONE – A Relationship with the Client

All of these healers had some kind of relationship or connection with their client. This doesn't necessarily mean an ongoing relationship – what it means to me is that they had a rapport with the person, meeting them at their map of the world & making them feel understood. (For more on this, see last week's tip).
 

ESSENTIAL TWO – A Healing Intention

All of these healers had “a healing intention”. I interpret this as an intention that whatever you're doing is for the wholeness & wellbeing of the client. One of the presuppositions of NLP is that people aren't broken so they don't need fixing. I like to hold this in mind as I work, so that I always remember that they're already whole, perfect & complete. And... sometimes my job is to nudge them into a greater experience of that wholeness.
 

ESSENTIAL THREE – A Method

All of the healers Dilts modeled had some kind of method, some kind of ritual. For some, it could be the process of diagnosis, for others, it might be a form of bodywork. In my case, it's asking questions to find out what's going on & using NLP to help make changes. In the case of another great healer I know, it's checking their pulses & sticking acupuncture needles in the clients body at particular points. The method doesn't seem to be too important: what IS important is that they have a method that they believe in.

Stop for a moment: what can you do to incorporate these three qualities whenever you're doing what you're doing with people, whether it's formal changework, managing people, doing customer service. The reality is that we live in a society that needs healing, so however you spend your time, there are probably opportunities to remind others of their sense of wholeness.

In my own case, I suddenly realised that I was using the energy therapy to show off to others (“Look at this cool thing I can do. Hold still!”). This was not a healing intention, & also interfered with my relationship to the other person. Once I realised this, I let go of that unhelpful intention & set an intention for wholeness, & voila! My results got better & better. 

I explore “The 3 Healing Eseentials” in depth on our new DVD set, The NLP Techniques Masterclass. If you're do changework with people, get your copy right away to ensure you give your clients the best experience & results possible. We've only produced 100 PAL & 100 NTSC copies, so order now to ensure you don't have to wait for the next run.

http://www.saladltd.co.uk/catalog/nlp-techniques-masterclass-dvd-set-p-170.html

Have a great week

To your success!

Your friend

Jamie

Jamie Smart

Jamie Smart
CEO
jamie.smart@saladltd.co.uk