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This Week’s Tip

Insanity has been described as doing the same thing, over and over, expecting to get a different result.  Intelligence, on the other hand, has been described as having a goal and being extremely flexible about how you achieve it.  This definition of intelligence is reflected in this simplistic structure of NLP:

1.       Decide what you want (think goal/outcome/direction)

2.       Figure out where you’re starting from (think rapport, meet them at their map of the world etc)

3.       Sense whether you’re getting what you want (think sensory acuity)

4.       Adjust what you’re doing accordingly (think behavioural flexibility)

If what you’re doing isn’t working, do something else

I was coaching someone once who wanted his team to carry out a piece of work in a certain way.  He said he’d told them again and again (12 times in total), but they still weren’t doing what he wanted.  I pointed out that if he wanted them to change what they were doing, he might have to change what he was doing (ie. I told him “be more flexible”.)  We explored some alternative approaches and things started to change.  So…

 1)      Identify an area where you’ve been doing the same thing over & over hoping to get a different result.

 2)      Clarify your goal in this area using the ‘What do you want’ / ‘How will you know’ questions (see NLP Tip #1)

 3)      Make a list of the different approaches / behaviours you have tried in order to achieve this goal.

 4)      Make a list of some alternative behaviours you will use to achieve the goal (get a friend to help if necessary.)  Then do them.

 Be more bendy

Mind & body are a single system, so it follows that physical flexibility can lead to greater mental flexibility.  There are certain activities which can greatly increase physical flexibility, including…

• Yoga

• Martial arts

• Dancing

• Swimming

 Practicing any of these will increase your overall behavioural and mental flexibility.  In addition, find opportunities to break habitual patterns.  For instance, most mornings when I shave, I do it in a different way.  This requires me to stay aware and vary my patterns.  The more flexibility you have, the more flexibility you can bring to situations involving others.

 5)      Identify a habitual pattern and change it.

 Here are some pattern-interrupters you might like to try:

• Eat a food that you never usually eat

• Go for a walk at 4 in the morning

• Watch a TV show you would never normally watch

• Have ‘evening meal’ food for breakfast

• Take a cold shower

• Answer your phone with the opposite hand to usual

• Laugh & smile for no reason

 The sooner you start doing this, the more fun you’ll have with it.

 More advanced

Actually do the exercises.  Believe me, that’s advanced!

 Summary

1)      Identify an area where you’ve been doing the same thing over & over hoping to get a different result.

2)      Clarify your goal in this area using the ‘What do you want’ / ‘How will you know’ questions (see NLP Tip #1)

3)      Make a list of the different approaches / behaviours you have tried in order to achieve this goal.

4)      Make a list of some alternative behaviours you will use to achieve the goal (get a friend to help if necessary.)  Then do them.

5)      Identify a habitual pattern and change it (see list)

Next time

Next time we’ll start exploring ways to influence yourself (& others) to remember to do the things you want them to do in the future.  Until then, see yourself being really flexible in the days & weeks ahead.  Have fun J

best wishes,

jamie

PS. Are you already an NLP Practitioner or Master Practitioner who would like to get another perspective on NLP?  We offer a 1/3 discount on prac & master prac training if you already hold that certificate.  Our workshops are small group sessions over 15 days so you really get the opportunity to build your skills.  With us, you & your results count.

Just drop me a line at info@saladltd.co.uk if you would like further information, or have a question

jamie smart

director

info@saladltd.co.uk

f you have found this tip useful, please share it with any friends, family, colleagues and associates who you think will be interested. Feel free to reprint it (with credit and subscription information) and continue to enjoy the tips. I am always grateful for any comments, criticisms or other feedback that you may have. Please send them to info@saladltd.co.uk

©2003 jamie smart all rights reserved

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